August 1st – Still Breathing

The moment I realized the first day of August is here–

Suddenly I feel restless.

I’m not really sure myself, but there is this tugging sensation at the pit of my stomach and I feel anxious to the point where my palms are sweating like crazy.

Pacing in my room and then going back to my desk while trying to mull my head around the how or why I began to feel this way.

It isn’t that I am lost– but, its more of like am anxious about something that is about to happen.

I mean, it has been roughly two weeks ever since I began to write about Bridge  —

and to be insanely honest, everyday has never been the same.

Writing in particular has never been the same.

Why would it be? (if in case you’ve been wondering why?)

I suppose it’s because apart from Velvet Valentine, which was my first novel from way back in 2015.

This is a story that hits closer to home than I’ve ever expected.

Working round the clock to the point where I would actually forget to eat or sleep– and it isn’t because I wanted to but, it’s mostly because I’ve been so lost in my own writing.

Sucked into this world that I’ve began to build, to where it has slowly taken a whole new LIFE of its own.

An experience that I’ve never experience before.

I think, this is what they call “Passion”  and for a moment–

I just might agree to anyone who would comment about it.

I would still try to manage and  grab a few bites but– somehow I feel the hunger still.

Only to realize that my hunger was not about food– but about the thoughts of how tot type down the story that has been stored inside my head.

I understood the sensation at one point where I would see a platter of a full meal from a buffet (after a friend of mine invited me out for dinner) –I found myself hardly able to grab a bite– let alone finish it at all.

Don’t get me wrong here. The food was amazing!

but, I suppose– when you find something you wanna write about. The story just floods out of your mind and when it starts to take into a shape or some sort of form into your writing. Well? I suppose it takes the whole of you and then later, it literally springs into life and becomes you.

Somehow, I wonder if this is how writers feel when they’ve found that one story that they’ve always wanted to write.

I know I said before that my story with Velvet was precious but— with Bridge?

It’s a whole different world.

I never imagined it would drive me to this point where I’d be willing to take a leap of faith just to catch a glimpse of what I’ll ever be capable of doing once I’m done with this whole writing.

I’ve been itching to share this story to the world– and even if I do have the copies for the comics of our first issue. It has taken me a bucket load of restrain to not release it just yet. The moment should be perfect and I want it out with the proper send off.

if you’re reading this right now my friend and you feel like you’ve felt the same. I hope that I was able to relay you the words you couldn’t muster to share to the world.

In the mean time, I shall return again to my writing.

My fingers are still moving and I still want to finish the latest chapter for the day. I don’t want this day to end without me completing chapter 4 and this is how much I want this story to press forward with all that I’ve got.

do leave me a comment or two about what you think. Will you? 🙂

I’d appreciate a good chat or exchange.

 

 

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